your tax dollars at work

So today I got a sampling of some of the fine people leeching off the government in the form of monthly disability checks. My favorite was probably this lovely gentleman: An older guy (maybe in his mid-50s), he came in looking somewhat awkward but not really exhibiting any of the disability symptoms I've seen in other people. Sometimes, people come in limping or struggle to open the door, and of course the cynic in me wonders how much they're exaggerating for the sake of the hearing. Not this dude, he just sat there picking at his finger nails.

A guard came in with him and posted himself in the back corner of the room. Now, I haven't really sat in on that many cases, but this was kind of unusual too. I wondered if it was some sort of new policy. Until about 3 minutes into the hearing, when upon questioning, the claimant revealed that he had recently been in prison for assault with a deadly weapon. Grr-eat. So hence, the guard at the door. In fact , the guy had spent approximately 20 years of his life in prison, over the course of 4 sentences for various offenses related to robbery and assault and battery. I loved that when the judge asked him how many years total, his first response was, "In County Jails too?"

So essentially, the guy's spent over a third of his life in prison. He stopped school in the 7th grade. In the last two decades, he's worked at one job for about a total of a year and another one for 11 days. He had to quit these jobs when had to go to prison. Darn. It appears that he had problems with drugs and alcohol in the past. Asked about his disability he said that he "can't be around other people" and that was why he couldn't work, that he got frustrated and angry and couldn't focus. Really, they're handing out disability for that these days? Where do I sign up?

Asked for his opinion of why that could be, he informed the judge that it was likely due to his numerous prison sentences. "I carry that fear with me out here on the streets." While he's sought help for his condition, "there's a lot inside" that he couldn't tell anyone.

OK, so at this point, I had to laugh. Not out loud or anything, but I couldn't stop smiling and I had to look down at my notebook. There was probably a period of about 5 minutes where I just couldn't look at him for fear that I'd start cracking up. How lucky are we to get that one sensitive assault-with-a-deadly-weapon-criminal! Totally priceless, right? "I always feel inferior and my feelings get hurt." Of course, I'm dying even more, but then he said, "I'll see people on the street and they'll be laughing at something. And I think they're laughing at me and it makes me angry. I can't shake it. And that's when I lose it." Uh oh. You can believe that I STOPPED smiling at that point. It would have been just my luck to be caught laughing at the hardened criminal that apparently assaults people for it!

Anyway, long story short, apparently he'll be getting disability. Which goes to show that if you want money from the government, all you have to do is drop out of school, attack a few people, come down with a drinking problem, and scare off anybody that might be tempted to give you a job. Seems to work every time. Well, I guess in all fairness, I have to admit that once the judge started reviewing the medical evidence, there did seem to be quite a history of bipolar depression disorder and schizophrenia. But none of that other stuff seemed to hurt either.

Plus, the judge pointed out after the hearing, he didn't seem bright enough to have made any of his stuff up. I hear that.