The background
As many of you may remember, my mom visited us for about a month around the time that Diya was born. We had a lot of little blow ups during that time because that's what my mom and I do. A particularly memorable one is when she got on my case for drinking one can of Sprite during the time that she was here. A can that I probably didn't finish because I rarely finish cans of soda and end up just sharing them with Gregg (who'll take like 3 big gulps and before I know it, it's all gone). Anyway, I remember that the can cost me a good half hour or so of complaining about how that can't be good for the baby (I was nursing at the time and Diya was probably just a week or two old), and how I shouldn't be drinking soda with all that sugar, etc etc. BTW, my mom thought there was nothing with me consuming up to several cups of coffee each day, but omg, the soda, the horror.
Also
I feel strongly that Diya doesn't need juice. She's old enough now to have some, but juice is actually considered pretty terrible for babies. They offer only empty calories, they can interfere with nutrient absorption, the actual fruit is supposed to be a better way to get the nutrients rather than the ingesting in the processed form of juice. Anyway, it's not great, but unfortunately, Diya's been pretty constipated and prune and apple juice are both supposed to help with that. So after talking to our pediatrician about it, I've been giving her small amounts of a prune/apple juice + water cocktail after each meal to help regulate her. I'm not wild about it, but I don't want her to be all plugged up either. The goal has always been to wean her off of it as soon as her body adjusts to the new foods in her system.
The convo
My mom: But didn't you guys have juice while you were growing up?
Me: Sure, but what does that matter? I don't want Diya having it. You guys let us drink it, so we had it. (I swear, I tried hard not to sound accusing here. Because, honestly, I don't see it as a point of childhood abuse or anything. Whatever, we had juice, we're still alive. It's not a big deal, but I feel strongly about it now. It's just that my mom was already starting to sound a little whiney and I was already a bit riled up. So I wasn't trying to be accusing, but I can't guarantee that my tone didn't sound annoyed).
My mom: Isn't it worse to have soda?
Me: Yeah, but I keep reading about how juice is one of the top 5 worst things to give to kids.
My mom: But isn't soda just as bad? There's so much sugar in it.
Me: Um, yes. But it's not like I'm going to be letting Diya drink soda either.
My mom: But you drink it. (And I swear, she said this like she was winning some sort of huge point).
The analysis
I will bet any of you a thousand dollars that this was her passive aggressive reference to me drinking that one can of Sprite over 6 months ago.
The supporting evidence
As many of you may remember, my mom visited us for about a month around the time that Diya was born. We had a lot of little blow ups during that time because that's what my mom and I do. A particularly memorable one is when she got on my case for drinking one can of Sprite during the time that she was here. A can that I probably didn't finish because I rarely finish cans of soda and end up just sharing them with Gregg (who'll take like 3 big gulps and before I know it, it's all gone). Anyway, I remember that the can cost me a good half hour or so of complaining about how that can't be good for the baby (I was nursing at the time and Diya was probably just a week or two old), and how I shouldn't be drinking soda with all that sugar, etc etc. BTW, my mom thought there was nothing with me consuming up to several cups of coffee each day, but omg, the soda, the horror.
Also
I feel strongly that Diya doesn't need juice. She's old enough now to have some, but juice is actually considered pretty terrible for babies. They offer only empty calories, they can interfere with nutrient absorption, the actual fruit is supposed to be a better way to get the nutrients rather than the ingesting in the processed form of juice. Anyway, it's not great, but unfortunately, Diya's been pretty constipated and prune and apple juice are both supposed to help with that. So after talking to our pediatrician about it, I've been giving her small amounts of a prune/apple juice + water cocktail after each meal to help regulate her. I'm not wild about it, but I don't want her to be all plugged up either. The goal has always been to wean her off of it as soon as her body adjusts to the new foods in her system.
The convo
My mom: But didn't you guys have juice while you were growing up?
Me: Sure, but what does that matter? I don't want Diya having it. You guys let us drink it, so we had it. (I swear, I tried hard not to sound accusing here. Because, honestly, I don't see it as a point of childhood abuse or anything. Whatever, we had juice, we're still alive. It's not a big deal, but I feel strongly about it now. It's just that my mom was already starting to sound a little whiney and I was already a bit riled up. So I wasn't trying to be accusing, but I can't guarantee that my tone didn't sound annoyed).
My mom: Isn't it worse to have soda?
Me: Yeah, but I keep reading about how juice is one of the top 5 worst things to give to kids.
My mom: But isn't soda just as bad? There's so much sugar in it.
Me: Um, yes. But it's not like I'm going to be letting Diya drink soda either.
My mom: But you drink it. (And I swear, she said this like she was winning some sort of huge point).
The analysis
I will bet any of you a thousand dollars that this was her passive aggressive reference to me drinking that one can of Sprite over 6 months ago.
The supporting evidence
- I am VERY sure that this is the only can of soda my mother has seen me drink in like 20 years. Not because it's the only one I've had, but it doesn't really happen with that much frequency (anywhere from a few times a week to every month or so). But more significantly, the times that I'm around my mother happen with even less frequency.
- My mother is the queen of passive aggressive. When the initial sprite incident happened, she brought it up for a good week or so after every time Diya seemed fussy or burped. As she did a separate incident where I had a few slices of cheesy pizza. When I rolled our garbage and recycling out to the curb a week or so after my c-section, she berated me for a good half hour. And then mentioned it off and on for weeks, especially to Gregg because I'm pretty sure she felt that he should have been the one to take the cans out (even though he didn't even realize I was taking the garbage out any more than she did -- they were both hanging out in the living room when I did it). She didn't come out and actually say that to him, but she must have told him at least a half dozen times how I shouldn't be doing things like that so soon after my surgery. And then she wanted me to ask my doctor about it at my next appointment 2 weeks later.
- I can think of ABSOLUTELY NO OTHER POINT to this conversation. We literally went from talking about constipation and juice to discussing the sugar content in soda. The juices I give Diya don't even have any added sugar in them. You draw me some other line that makes even a little bit of sense, and I will happily consider it.
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